Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Yarn Man and the Case of theJapanese Army of Cute Little Jpop Rockettes - Part 3

As Colonel Molson discussed the crime scene with a Davenport Police officer they heard a rumbling from overhead. Instinctively Molson looked toward a jet as it slowly descended vertically in a parking lot yards from where he was standing. He instantly recognized it as a modified Harrier Jump Jet. Instead of the Marine Corps marking he knew a bright aquamarine “YM” was painted across the jet’s pink tail fin.

“What in San Juan Hill is that?” grumped the Colonel as he stopped toward the jet.

As the Colonel made it to the curb the canopy on the jet slid open and man clad in pink with an aquamarine mask climbed down a ladder that flopped out from a hidden compartment.

As he reached the ground a golden retriever stuck her head out of the cock pit and looked down at her master. Yarn man extended his arm and Yarn dog jumped down to him. As Yarn Man placed his dog on the ground Colonel Molson was tapping him in the shoulder.

“What and the hell are you?”

“Yarn Man and this is my faithful side kick Yarn Dog.” stated Yarn Man with a broad smile extending his hand to the Colonel.

“Son what exactly is wrong with you?” asked Molson looking over his outfit.

“Dude, check with Homeland Security I am supposed to be here.”

“This is the yarn expert?” asked the Colonel looking to the plain clothes detective from the Davenport Police department.

The detective nodded in the affirmative and Molson turned back to Yarn Man.

“What can you tell us about this?” asked the Colonel reluctantly.

At that Yarn dog ran across the side walk and over to a hunk of wire in the street. Yarn man quickly followed picking up the piece of wire when he got there.

“Your right Yarn Dog, this is made on the Titanium Wonder Knitter.”

“What is a wonder knitter?” As the Colonel as he followed Yarn Man

“It is a top secret knitting device stolen from the Clover Needlecraft Corporation. I was told there were some Morning Musume CDs left behind.”

“Yes the two leaders appear to be members of this group.” stated the colonel.

“It is a smoke screen.” stated Yarn Man.

“This is one involved smoke screen.”

“Yes, where is the Jpop army now?” asked Yarn Man looking at the billowing smoke from down the street.

“They are a mile down this road. They have set up a defensive position in a strip mall. They have thirty busses that have converged on that position. The local police appear to have them cornered.”

“Do you have transport?” asked Yarn Man.

The Colonel nodded and gestured over to a Humvee.

“And why does Homeland Security allow a loonie in pink out fit to fly around the country in a Harrier?”

“Because there are evil forces out there trying to take over the knitting world.”

“No offence son, but are you smoking something?” asked the Colonel as he got in the back of his Hummer.

“Were are the rest of your troops?” asked Yarn Man as he let Yarn Dog into the Hummer.

“I command the Rock Island Arsenal. I only have 250 troops. Besides it is illegal for the Armed Forces to operate within U.S. territory without a Presidential Order.” stated the Colonel as the Hummer began down the half destroyed street.

“You had better call the President and get that permission.”

Down the street what little bit there was of the Davenport Police Department was hiding behind what cover they could find. As the Colonel and his troops arrived the Iowa State Police were also just arriving on the scene.

The brightly colored armored bussed were lined up on a semi circular patter in the parking lot of the strip mall. The strip mall itself completed the fortification. Yarn Man knew that this meant trouble. They were planning to stay wether the good people of Iowa wanted them to or not.

“Do you have a weapons son? Are you mentally stable enough to handle a weapon?”

As the Colonel asked his question Yarn Man pulled a .357 Magnum from a concealed pouch in his utility belt. With a fair amount a trepidation the Colonel got out of the vehicle with his new buddy.

“Lock and load, Baby!” exclaimed Yarn Man as he jumped out of the Hummer. His side kick Yarn Dog only whimpered as she followed her slightly touched master.

“Hey I heard that Dude.” whined Yarn Man who had still not learned to not argue with the dashing narrator.

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