Wednesday, August 27, 2008
My Baby Cat's Daddy
This is Walt and his baby Max. You can see the resemblance. Max is not as harry though but I digress.
Actually I have to go off in left to make this story make some seance. But remember the image above. The image of this wanna be humorist and his feline offspring.
On Monday I was bit by by a pit bull. By the way if you are keeping track this is the left feild part of the story. Keep in mind mr funny guy and his cat. He is the one with the punch line about my terrible pain and suffering.
The dog gave me one good bite in the arm and ran off with his own. By the way if you live on the South Side Slopes and know a young black man who is six foot tall with corn rows and a brown and tan marble colored pit bull. That is the dog that bit me. Stay away he is grumpy. The grumpy thing aplies to to the dog and his negligent owner. He ran away with out giving information about if his dog had it's shot. So friday I will be complaining about how much rabies shots hurt. It will give you something to look forward to.
Oh and I really I looking fo this guy. He is danger to everyone he runs into.
Anway I went to the hospital to get six stiches to put my left bicept back togather. I have mad more stitches at one time so this was nothing. My wife continually through the entire process mae jokes about how good I taste. She hoped that Sally our dog did not find out because she is frequently hungry at night.
After that I want to our regular knitting night from the hospital. Luckly there is still a hospital on the South Side for the moment. The knitting night was filled with lovely comment about my taste. Walt and amy wife tage teamed me with hillarious comment the entire evening. It weas really something to see. By the way not once did either one of them ask if it hurt because they thought it was so funny.
On a side not walt is sitting here as I type this. He said said he assumed it hurt. So apparently rather than being sympathetic he thought he should go strait to ridicule. He is not claiming that laughter is the best medicen. If anyone if keeping that only really works if the injured person is laughing. It doesn't work so well if all his freinds are making fun of him. Just a note for you future Patch Admas out there.
Fast forward to today. I went to my Corps for our regular clown practice. I had to print out some stuff in one of the offices. I sat down and started working at the computer. Little did I know my Captain just got a new dog. Little did I know that dog was sleeping in the office I happened to be in. After i climbed out of the ceiling tile from being scared within an inch of my life/ I noted that it was a baby Scottish Terrier and not a Pitt Bull. So I felt really stupid.
My Captain then came in and explained the dog started me. He thought I was wimp. I explained why I was jumpy. He still thought I was a wimp.
That brings me to clown practice this evening. No one asked if I was alright. The children wanted to see the dog bite. They are too young to see it. So for the entire evening a group of little girl were explaining to me how tough they are. To add insult to injury they were also talking about a cuteness scale.
At the top of the scale at number 1 is kittens. Number two is puppies. Number three is Walt. Take a look at the picture. Walt is the big one without stripes incase your coudn't tell. Not only is he cuter than me. He is number three on the list for cutuest things ever according to our click of little girls in the Clown Brigade. Of course I had to ask. I probably shoudn't have asked. I am 1, 083rd on the list directly behind rather large snails. By the way they beat because they shells and cute antena.
Remeber me telling you this was going to left feild. I am going to bring back right about now. Walt observed that the Pitt Bull only bit me once. I said yeah that is right. He said that he only bit me once because as a clown i taste funny. Ha Ha Ha
As I type this Walt is having a hard time breathing because he is laughing so hard at the story. The truely sad thing is that it is true. This is an average week from my life.
On a serious side I am just fine. The dog didn;t really get a nerve and only hurt one muscle. So there will be nothing wrong with me in a couple weeks.
If you do happen to see that guy or his dog call animal control and tell them it was from the attack and Angelo Street on Monday the 25th on the South Side. They don;t actually have anyone to investigate this so I have to find the guy before they will press charges.
Be safe out there and keep your stick on the ice.